did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
