what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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