She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
no more duck duck goose at the bar
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
