It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
