just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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