so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
