Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
