just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
