some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize