is your mom at the bar?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
