that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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