Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
