Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
