I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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