I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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