she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
