Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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