you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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