i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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