if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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