He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
