I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
