You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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