hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
