So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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