that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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