Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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