i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
