From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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