Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
