Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I wish you could order shots online.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
