I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I touched a dick in church today
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
