You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
My Higher Power is John Stamos
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
