then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
