Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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