are you still at the devil's house?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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