My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
