I bet he comes in French.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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