So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
