We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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