Just fell off a train. Bad.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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