If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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