She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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