i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
