he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
