Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
