what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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