i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
