The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
