hotel room ftw
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
stop calling my apartment porn island.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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